Friday, December 14, 2012
Chapter 2: "5:12 AM, 12-14-12"
"Teach me good judgment and knowledge, for I believe in your commandments. Before I was afflicted I went astray, but now I keep your word." Psalm 119:66-67
This morning at 5:12 AM on Friday, December 14th 2012 will be the moment I never forget for the rest of my life. Lately I've been suffering from severe depression while being up here in Seminary school in Atlanta, GA and have for a while been lacking in the spirit. Though the Lord has been blessing with amazing opportunities relationship and job opportunity wise, I still have been lacking the most important thing in my life, and that is the "JOY" of Having Jesus Christ in my life. I AM FREE because of His merciful compassion, yet I still fall into constant Sin over and over again. I'm afraid of seeking His face, because of how wretched I've been lately with selfishness and falling into constant temptation, yet HE WHO DISCIPLINES US BECAUSE HE LOVES US sends me John 20:23 and John 5:39 because He wants me to repent from the wrongful way I've been living.
It's beautiful when He sent to me Psalm 119:66-67 after these convicting words because it takes a "stab in the heart" to really pierce us and show us true conviction of "HOW WRETCHED" we really are. Yet it was during this "BLESSED" month that God fulfilled "HIS PROMISE" from Isaiah 9:6-7
"For to us a child is born, to us va son is given; and the government shall be upon his shoulder, and his name shall be called Wonderful yCounselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. Of the increase of his government and of peace there will be no end, on the throne of David and over his kingdom, to establish it and to uphold it
with justice and with righteousness from this time forth and forevermore."
Today, the Spirit has asked of me to live my life freely now in Christ, and to no longer live like the pharisees, but to experience fully in the joy HE had made for us since we were born from the womb. I ask of you today, when you seek the words of Psalm 119:66-67...."Do you truly believe in His commandments and promise for your life?"
May the words of my mouth, and the meditations of my heart be pleasing in your sight my almighty King!
Monday, September 17, 2012
Chapter 1: Pain and Rebirth
It's been over one year since my last blog, and it's also been one year since my return from a place I will always remember where God changed my life forever. Since my journey back from Rwanda, I've experienced new beginnings twice now. I started as a TV News Producer at WBKO in Bowling Green, Kentucky from August of last year (2011), and now I'm starting another journey which I must say has been a long time in the making as a seminary student in Marietta, Georgia. So if you are seeing the picture, you must know that I love traveling from place to place, and who knows next where I may end up (Rwanda, Alabama, Alaska, Italy, Timbuktu, or heck even the Moon) but I do know this, the Lord is moving like a wildfire in my life since that plane hit U-S soil, and I must say I'm quite stoked for where He uses me in the next four years after I earn my Masters of Divinity.
Now even with all this excitement, my time back in the U-S has been one of both great pain and rebirth time and time again, and since my time here in Marietta, I've been through moments of great trial. From the day I started last August as a News Producer to now as a seminary student, I've gone through heart aches, hurting other people, doubting my faith, and even cursing at God over things that didn't go my way, and over and over again after seeing my life now I see that I have gone through two key things and that is PAIN and REBIRTH.
Now to define pain, I've not used the dictionary but have gone to another source, and that is through God's mighty Words of the Bible. It is in here, that I've seen great men such as King David, Job, Paul, Daniel, Joseph, and our LORD AND SAVIOR JESUS CHRIST and have seen that even good and honest people have suffered through tremendous moments in there lives. One of the strongest passages I saw that in came from 2 Samuel 12. Now for a brief look before this chapter, King David, who I really admired in the bible, has just committed one of the worst sins against God, and that is committing adultery in sleeping with another man's wife (Bathsheba). It was here that after finding out that she bore him a son, King David was terrified of this and decided to put her husband in the front lines of his army, which to be honest was a death sentence pretty much when it comes to war tactics. The man ends up dying which leads to David marrying Bathsheba. After all of this, Nathan, who was a prophet and advisor to the king, delivers a message from God to David telling him of this horrid sin he has just committed (MURDER AND ADULTERY) and as punishment would see his new born son die as punishment for his sins. The main part that really hit me was seeing from 2 Samuel 12:16-23 the suffering he endured through this. He wept and cried aloud to God begging for mercy and that He might spare his son from death, his prayers went unanswered and the child died.
It's through this pain I saw the reflection in my life the things I've done to people these past few months, I too have felt like an adulterer and have hurt people who have been dear to me for the longest time in my life. I feel like I've been through hell these past few weeks over what I've done to people and it all comes from my selfishness in wanting what I WANT, and not what God wants. Time and time again I get advice from Godly people, and have instead rejected their wisdom and have in the end hurt them by disrespecting them and pursuing WHAT I WANT. I received a message from God, in the form of disappointment, and see the sins I've committed and have weeped and begged God and those I've hurt for forgiveness. I've lost respect and have a tarnished image over this, and it feels like everything around me is dark.
All of a sudden God showed me something truly marvelous through the aftermath of God's wrath on David through 2 Samuel 22 and it's David praising his Heavenly Father after finally returning to Jerusalem and singing a song speaking of how Loving, and Graceful God truly is in these times. You see after reading this you see that though God has put David through darkness, He never leaves him, and more importantly blesses him even more giving his BLOODLINE as the one where JESUS would be born from. He's even given a son who would become another great king (Solomon) and sees the city prosper again through his reign. Now I don't expect to have all this happen to me, but it made me see one of the greatest things occur, DAVID WAS GIVEN REBIRTH AGAIN, and it is in these hard times he faced that He began to learn from his mistakes, and also grew more in love with HIS FATHER through this.
My brothers and sisters in Christ, I encourage you to look back at your life and see moments you've felt just like this, or are even going through this right now and see from those times you went through pain and see the new things God has shown you through this. Jesus has given you new life again, and always reminds those who in HIM that HE will NEVER LEAVE YOU, OR FORSAKE YOU for the mistakes you've made. It is through this discipline, that you learn from your mistakes, and you also begin to see just HOW MUCH JESUS REALLY CARED YOU through the pain HE WENT THROUGH for you. I pray that these blog entries may give you encouragement in the hardships you face and know that if you need something prayed over or are going through something, that JESUS LOVES YOU SO MUCH, LET HIM INTO YOUR LIFE AND TALK TO HIM, BECAUSE HE CARES FOR YOU!!!!!
In Christ's Never Ending Love,
Adam
Now even with all this excitement, my time back in the U-S has been one of both great pain and rebirth time and time again, and since my time here in Marietta, I've been through moments of great trial. From the day I started last August as a News Producer to now as a seminary student, I've gone through heart aches, hurting other people, doubting my faith, and even cursing at God over things that didn't go my way, and over and over again after seeing my life now I see that I have gone through two key things and that is PAIN and REBIRTH.
Now to define pain, I've not used the dictionary but have gone to another source, and that is through God's mighty Words of the Bible. It is in here, that I've seen great men such as King David, Job, Paul, Daniel, Joseph, and our LORD AND SAVIOR JESUS CHRIST and have seen that even good and honest people have suffered through tremendous moments in there lives. One of the strongest passages I saw that in came from 2 Samuel 12. Now for a brief look before this chapter, King David, who I really admired in the bible, has just committed one of the worst sins against God, and that is committing adultery in sleeping with another man's wife (Bathsheba). It was here that after finding out that she bore him a son, King David was terrified of this and decided to put her husband in the front lines of his army, which to be honest was a death sentence pretty much when it comes to war tactics. The man ends up dying which leads to David marrying Bathsheba. After all of this, Nathan, who was a prophet and advisor to the king, delivers a message from God to David telling him of this horrid sin he has just committed (MURDER AND ADULTERY) and as punishment would see his new born son die as punishment for his sins. The main part that really hit me was seeing from 2 Samuel 12:16-23 the suffering he endured through this. He wept and cried aloud to God begging for mercy and that He might spare his son from death, his prayers went unanswered and the child died.
It's through this pain I saw the reflection in my life the things I've done to people these past few months, I too have felt like an adulterer and have hurt people who have been dear to me for the longest time in my life. I feel like I've been through hell these past few weeks over what I've done to people and it all comes from my selfishness in wanting what I WANT, and not what God wants. Time and time again I get advice from Godly people, and have instead rejected their wisdom and have in the end hurt them by disrespecting them and pursuing WHAT I WANT. I received a message from God, in the form of disappointment, and see the sins I've committed and have weeped and begged God and those I've hurt for forgiveness. I've lost respect and have a tarnished image over this, and it feels like everything around me is dark.
All of a sudden God showed me something truly marvelous through the aftermath of God's wrath on David through 2 Samuel 22 and it's David praising his Heavenly Father after finally returning to Jerusalem and singing a song speaking of how Loving, and Graceful God truly is in these times. You see after reading this you see that though God has put David through darkness, He never leaves him, and more importantly blesses him even more giving his BLOODLINE as the one where JESUS would be born from. He's even given a son who would become another great king (Solomon) and sees the city prosper again through his reign. Now I don't expect to have all this happen to me, but it made me see one of the greatest things occur, DAVID WAS GIVEN REBIRTH AGAIN, and it is in these hard times he faced that He began to learn from his mistakes, and also grew more in love with HIS FATHER through this.
My brothers and sisters in Christ, I encourage you to look back at your life and see moments you've felt just like this, or are even going through this right now and see from those times you went through pain and see the new things God has shown you through this. Jesus has given you new life again, and always reminds those who in HIM that HE will NEVER LEAVE YOU, OR FORSAKE YOU for the mistakes you've made. It is through this discipline, that you learn from your mistakes, and you also begin to see just HOW MUCH JESUS REALLY CARED YOU through the pain HE WENT THROUGH for you. I pray that these blog entries may give you encouragement in the hardships you face and know that if you need something prayed over or are going through something, that JESUS LOVES YOU SO MUCH, LET HIM INTO YOUR LIFE AND TALK TO HIM, BECAUSE HE CARES FOR YOU!!!!!
In Christ's Never Ending Love,
Adam
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